Today locals where baffled leaving their homes and looking out from their windows to see strange white stuff had fallen across the town leaving people questioning their understanding of seasons and the whole concept of winter. Baffled residents then proceeded to alert the general population to social media stating “it’s snowing” as studies suggest 98% of people were unable to get to a window OR door to see the spectacle.
BUT what is this white stuff? Well, we decided to ring up a meteorologist to demand answers as widespread panic buying has already gridlocked the streets with local supermarkets unable to meet the demand.
“So,” our reporter says sitting breathing heavily down the phone. “What is this white stuff?” “Well, what it is, the EARTH goes around the sun at an angle which causes seasons and what we are seeing is just frozen water falling from the sky which is commonly known as SNOW. We are urging people NOT to panic as this is a natural phenomenon that occurs when its cold…ITS CALLED WEATHER.”
“But as a meteorologist, surely you study meteorites NOT weather, so could this white stuff be some sort of Meteorite impact FROM OUTER SPACE?” Asks our reporter. “ meteorologists study the weather,” they reply.
So there you have it, when it gets cold, it snows, when it gets warm it doesn’t snow. No need to panic, ALL IS WELL.
This has been A Stockport Tourism exclusive. Stayed tuned for more weather reports if and when we get them from Facebook (as we don’t have windows at the Tourism Office)